The Lotion Theory

I'm at my breaking point.

I'm at 147 pounds and have never been over 150 in my life, except when pregnant.

I call this weight, slightly under 150, my breaking point. I am most comfortable around 130. At 130, I look pretty good and I can eat whatever I feel like eating as long as I exercise very regularly. I'd love to be 125. But if I try to go under 130, and I've tried it before, it's a food-managment nightmare that I never enjoy. Life is not fun that way. I can do this Weight Watchers thing, I've done it before, but I can't do it for more than about 3 months. Just enough to get back to 130 and then maintain it with exercise.

But so I started thinking. Why haven't I ever been over 150 in my life? I mean, truthfully, I can eat like a pig. I am a huge fan of the food and drink. Eating and drinking is seriously one of my favorite pastimes. But for someone with my attitude towards food to never, ever go more than 19 pounds overweight?

How do I manage that? How does this happen?

Lotion.

Yes, that's right. Moisturizer. See, the thing is, I apply this stuff to my skin every day. Every day I get out of the shower and lotion myself up. My hands touch every external surface of my body. And my reality is, when I start heading up into the upper 140's, my hands can feel it.

And they don't like what they feel, baby. No they don't.

My hands get to that point where they are not happy and my whole being can sense it. I can put on 5 or 10 pounds and notice it. But when I hit 15, oh my stars, my hands start to shake. They say, baby, it's time to hit the points.

The Weight Watchers points that is.

The Points! Oh, The Points!

For the past week I have been utterly disciplined with my points. 20 points a day, no more no less. It was easy - I ate those wretched frozen meals and counted up the points and stopped when I got to twenty.

And I was faint with hunger and crabby all week.

So - I signed up for WW online, read some recipes, talked with my girlfriends who have done it before, and now I am eating real food again and watching my points.

Monday I slipped up badly, but I will not bore you with the details of my consumption of three giant cheese bagels with rich creamy neufchatel cheese spread lavishly across each carb laden crust. Ahem.

Here are my goals. I am 5'7" and a half. I have always weighed somewhere between 125 and 128 pounds. Always. Well, with the giant exception of pregnancy. Yes, I am a Weight Watchers virgin, but I'm here to tell you that over the course of four pregnancies, averaging fifty pounds in weight gain each, I have actually gained and lost almost 200 pounds in my life. So don't give me crap on the 125 thing - I'm small boned.

Right now I weigh 137 pounds (yikes!!!) and more worrisome, my waist measurement is three inches bigger than it normally is. This bothers me for the reason it should bother all apple-shaped women: heart health. Science has proven the correlation between abdominal fat and heart attack risk, so I am wanting to whittle things down to mitigate my risk for heart problems as I age. Heart disease runs in my family so I am not taking this lightly.

My biggest goal with losing this weight is incorporating more fresh healthy options into my snacking routine. With four kids, I tend to nosh on the crap they can consume, what with their wiry frames and active metabolisms. I need quantity. When I'm working out I can eat a lot, but I have been hit hard with colds and infections this winter, so I need to manage things with food. I am also hoping that with a healthier diet, maybe I won't get so sick each winter.

So today, as my kids ate sliced pears, cookies, milk and kettle chips after school, here is what I snacked on. And guess what? It was DELICIOUS.

I took several large leaves of a vibrant red cabbage and lined a plate with them. Then I shelled one and a half cups of edamame and sprinkled the soy beans over the leaves. Then I liberally spritzed the entire plate with the Wish Bone Asian flavored dressing (at one calorie a spritz!). It was crispy, crunchy and savory - everything I look for in a snack. AND it was pretty - all that purple and bright green. Total points: Two. And I rounded up.

For dinner I had a huge baked potato. I sprayed it with "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" ( yeah - I hate fake food and sprays - but right now I can't spare the olive oil, okay?) then I sprinkled a quarter of a cup of light Mexican blend cheese, slathered it in hot spicy salsa, and topped it with zuccini and mushrooms sauteed in organic olive oil Pam and garlic.

Filling, delicious, and less than five points.

What in the world do you eat?

I've been following the Weight Watchers program for what seems like forever (but in reality is only about 5 years). I joined when I first dispelled the myth that nursing evaporates baby fat and found myself several months postpartum with an extra twenty pounds on top of the extra twenty pounds I'd been hosting since the early days of my courtship with my darling husband.

When I say that I've followed WW, what I mean is that from the day I joined until I reached my goal weight, with the exception of a few vacations, I was unstoppable. I journaled every bite. I always kept within my point range (at the time, it was Winning Points, which is a lot like Flex and I'm sure many other future and former versions) and I lost every week. I became a Lifetime member, and have continued to weigh in monthly, maintaining at or below my WW goal weight since 2003, putting my program on hold during my second pregnancy and returning to my goal weight soon after.

The big secret here - my Weight Watchers goal is not my personal goal. It's a number I picked where I thought I could maintain even on the worst days. Since having my second child, my weight has been closer to that pretend goal weight and not my actual goal weight and I've decided to do something about it.

It is hard to make losing weight/staying fit/making lifestyle changes the biggest priority when you've got a lot going on in your life. I'm not saying it can't be done, but at least for me, the busier I am, the more likely I am to eat what my kids are eating, rely on takeout food, or (gasp!) stop trying altogether.

Now that I've joined Jen and Kristi in this blog, I'm going to write a lot about the foods I eat that make this kind of lifestyle realistic for me. You're going to see my food journals and recipes - I happen to find it fascinating to learn their how people allot their daily point budget, always hoping to find delicious and filling meals, snacks and treats that will help me to eat and live well. Maybe you'll share yours, too.

Now, my dietary caveats: I don't eat pork or shellfish for religious reasons. I avoid red meat, processed/refined sugars and dairy because they don't agree with me. I don't use artificial sweeteners or heavily processed products if I can help it.

With all that introduction, please enjoy my impossibly low point Turkey Meatloaf.

This my variation of the Old Fashioned Meatloaf recipe off of the Quaker Oats box, adapted from a posting off the Weight Watchers online message boards.

1 1/4 pound lean (99% fat free) ground turkey
3/4 cup oatmeal (not instant)
1/4 cup chopped onion*
1/2 teaspoon salt*
1/4 teaspoon ground pepper
1 cup tomato sauce
1 egg

Preheat oven to 350. In a small skillet, cook the onions over medium heat until just translucent, about 3-5 minutes. Remove from heat and cool slightly.

Squish the ingredients together in a medium size bowl with your hands (a great way to involve children with freshly washed hands). Transfer mix to a loaf pan and bake for approximately 45 minutes or until cooked through.

Makes 8 servings, 2 points per serving.

* The original recipe calls for 1 1/2 teaspoons of salt, but given the salt in the tomato sauce, it is overwhelming, so I've dropped it to 1/2 tsp.

Before baking, I top my meatloaf with ketchup or a combination of ketchup and barbeque sauce, depending on what I have in the refrigerator. I'm sure this changes the points value slightly.

Now I'm going to scour this thread on chowhound.com for some more ideas.

This Is The Kind of Husband I Have

This is the kind of husband I have---I have the kind of husband that will make himself a grilled cheese sandwich for lunch, the yummy kind with the really bad for you American cheese and lots of butter, and then he'll cut it in half, eat only half, and leave the other half lying on the cutting board.

All day.

Staring me in the face. All day.

I walked by it multiple times. I even pulled some cooked, but cold, green beans out of the fridge, stood right next to the sandwich half, and munched on my green beans.

Yeah. I did.

But I'm wondering. Who eats only half of a grilled cheese? I'd eat my whole sandwich and then the leftovers the kids didn't eat. I'd even eat the pieces that accidentally dropped on the floor and wouldn't give a hoot about no 5 second rule. I'd eat a double decker grilled cheese. I'd eat enough for you, me, and the guy next door.

My husband is the kind of guy who eats only half.

And leaves the other half lying on the cutting board all day.

Maybe he should try living on 20 Weight Watchers Points a Day. Just for fun, y'know?